VO: Attention all teachers, students, subsitute teachers and guidance couselors, here are your morning announcements....
-We'll have ratings from a mathemathican....
-We'll discuss news from the school paper....
-And our drama team will take GSN to school. Yes, from the WIlton-North Building where I got it bad, got it bad, got it baaaaad, I'm hot for teacher, it's.....
GSN The Know, the blog that almost knows a lot about everything. Here is Pierre Kelly.
Me: Hello students, my name is.....
(writes name on NYSI telestrator)
Mr. Kelly. Class, take our your textbooks and turn to our first period. Please take notes as Hilty reads the report from the ratings.
Family Feud took the first 3, but Fifth Grader took up 4th and Chain Reaction was 7th in a sandwich with FEud and the latter took the rest of the top 10. Doing good so far, class? Good, now we go to the bottom 10. The ones stuck in the principal's office all week.
Match Game was in a sandwich with 100K Pyramid and Baggage, while another one connects to $ale. P+ came next and DED parted the kiddie pool with Baggage. That's the first. Let me turn Hilty off.
TIme for a break, but don't put your head down on the desks just yet, because after this break, news on Bible. More GTK after I hit the teacher's lounge for a soda and chips. Talk amongst yourselves, students while I'm gone.
(song fades out)
(song fades out)
Welcome back students....uh, guys quiet down.....I said.....
Thank you. We have the second period done by gameshownetworknews.blogspot.com. I heard a rumor....
....That Jeff Foxworthy may or may not stay with The American Bible Challenge. GSN is currently negotiating a contract with him that could be worth.....some money. But you never know when he'll stick around or not. Keeping up with Bible, this call & response brings us to a short & sweet edition of....
Twitter Theater. This exchange took place from July 16th and it went a little something like this.....
@chicagosports91: @GSN_Bible when does the nxt season start?
@GSN_Bible: We hope soon, still waiting for official word on if there will be a season 3. Fingers and toes crossed!
And by IF, if could be by the time the Olympics may be over, but we'll see.
Uh, thank you school band. Now on to some more news on "The Chase." We've added more pictures from Flasher and here they come:
Next, place your bets on this.....
Here Comes Honey Boo Boo and Cake Boss......on Family Feud. This oughta raise a few eyebrows at the hit show.
Time for the 2nd intermission. This week, we focus on Kurt Hugo Schnieder. Who is he? Well, he's one half of a duo with Sam Tsui, both out of Yale University. How do the 2 blend well? Watch the video and find out.
Now the 3rd period. As prmosied, GSN is going back to school. When GSN began, everyone was in the nursery when 1995 arrived. Now turning 19, the average kid goes to either high school or community college. Any kid born aournd the 80's turned to GSN right around the time they were in elementary or middle school. If GSN had an actual school, the average student would have this schedule for instance....
Period 1-Survey results-Mr. Harvey
Period 2-Advanced Spelling-Mr. Engvall
Period 3-Physical Education-Mr. Ohno
Period 5-Biblical Studies-Mr. Foxworthy
Period 6-Scientific Links-Mr. Lane
Period 7-Sex Education-Ms. Shepard
As for extracirricular activites, You would try making the cut on a Family Feud varsity team since the network airs many Feud shows per host. Better yet, you could sing in the choir with Mr. Franklin. You can skip ballroom dancing with Mr. Bergeron or better yet.....hold it.......Bartering with Mr. Stone. Both are no longer in the classroom. But what about the school supplies and what it applies to GSN?
Well, for starters, the pencil. Why? You could make up surveys, suggest any MTWI stunt or.....write questions TABC didn't ask in the last 2 seasons?
Every pencil has an eraser. Why? Because if your show can't stuggle with many people, just erase it and find a show people haven't seen in a while. I'm talking to you, Love Triangle.
Markers? Yeah, we got that. Match Game has 'em. All you need is 3 x 5 cards and you're good to go at 7 am in the morning.
Then comes rulers. You can make mock versions of game show sets of your favroite GSN shows anytime you want. Just use your imagination and let it go.
Need podiums? Use construction paper, glue and crayons to make your own Pyramid seating area, or the winner's circle. Better yet, use notebooks to write down your plans.
As if that wasn't enough, we have lunchboxes. Write down a secret, stick it inside the lunchbox with crazy glue and Bang! Your own version of Baggage. Try it with your friends.
And finally the most important supply of all.......paper clips. They can take ratings, use it and react to the internet people.
WHat you have just seen is somewhat fictional and is not affilated with copmanies of shows seen on GSN, the network itself, GSN The Know industries, Marty Derosa Enterprises and Warner Communications, which is responsible for it's content.
Class dismissed kiddies. Today's blog is brought to you by Detention. It's depressing and it's no fun. To make matters worse.....Mark "The Beast" Labett as your teacher. Does that creep you out? I think not, but anyways.....
Don't forget to email me at email@example.com, firstname.lastname@example.org, Pierre Jason Kelly on FB and @Johnny_Arcade on twitter. We'll see you later and play on, playas.