Wednesday, December 13, 2017

The 1st annual Game Show Live! honors

Madison Brunoehler: Live.....from Playhouse on the Center square, from coast to Coast, Shore to Shore, Border to Border and beyond the far reaches of our galaxy's solar system, it's time to go all the way live one last time in 2017 as we present the......

......Honors. With performances by.......







Now here is America's favorite contestant, Pierre Kelly!!!!! 


Me: Thank you all.

(band stops playing and applause)

Hello and welcome to the very first ever.........Game Show Live! honors. 


We were live as we got it, as live as it happened and as live whenever we felt like it. Now we're getting 2017 lit for the last time this year. Please say hi if you can for Robyn Cage and her orchestra!


Now you may think The Kennedy Center Honors is about honoring the arts and all that. Well, the Game Show Live! honors is about saluting the year it was in game shows. Earlier, we held a pizza buffet luncheon at Cici's in uptown Grimsborough and gave a speech to all the nominees. After a "Church pot luck" reception in the theater's lobby, we've arrived at the stage and throughout the event, the vendors will sell cotton candy and hot dogs until the last award and performance. Sure, Caroline Kennedy may be staring at the people with medal around their necks, but around here, we're a fun-loving awards show and to give you an example, our Match Game mistress of impressionism Madi2theMax who is our announcer is going to be reciting a Taylor Swift song. Madison, please......

(laughter and applause)

Now let's get on with the ceremony. Our first award is Best Reboot. Sometimes you gotta use something old and make it something new for the primetime crowd and our nominees prove just that. Watch.

(cut to "Survive The Internet" gameplay)

(reveal bottom comment that says Oh, really?")

(Reveal main comment that says "your older 1997 computer needs a new upgrade")

(pop-up window in the corner reveals "Best Reboot", clicks on it and shows the videos)

The $100,000 Pyramid (Sony pictures TV)

BATTLE of the Network Stars (IMG)

Snoop Dogg Presents The Joker's Wild (Snoopzilla FIlms/Sony Pictures TV)

The Gong Show (Sony Pictures TV)

Love Connnection (Warner Horizon TV)

(pop-up window says "Click ok to reboot your computer")  

(fade to host)

Ok, best reboot is...........................

(opens Lootcrate for the winner)

Well it's............The $100,000 Pyramid!


Madison: Accepting the award, the host of teh show, Michael Strahan.

Michael: Wow, can't believe you turned this summer hit into a bigger hit, I would like to thank the staff, the writers, the people back at GMA and everyone here, thank you very much.


Now we turn your attention to a lady with a ukelele......and a song.....and this weird name: Danielle Ate The Sandwich!!!!



Me: Our next award is.....well..........a weak award. Nominees, please.

(cut to "Monster Seeking Monster" gameplay)

(One user: Hey baby, wanna go to the movies tonight?)

(another user: Can you please hold, I got a man of my own.)

(one user: Wait, what?)

(top of the screens shows "rejection")

(picture frame shows "Worst Show of 2017")

CANDY CRUSH (Endemol/King)

SAVE TO WIN (On The Couch/Greenhop/JZ/Litton)

THE GONG SHOW (Sony pictures TV)

DIVIDED (Sony Pictures TV/GSN)



(picture frame of "Worst Show of 2017" hangs and falls off)

(fade to host; light applause)

And the winner, er loser is.................

(opens Lootcrate)

Holy smokes, Candy Crush!!!

(3 people applause)

Madison: Accepting the award....Mario Lopez.

(song stops)

Mario: Thank you so much, I was hoping why the 3 of you were living this program, but love it or hate it.....

(vacuum sucks up Mario and crowd cheers)

Me: Hope that's the last of him. Next up, 2 Hawaiians were dressed in 2 colors. No, it's not a bad Double Dare reboot, it's.........the ever popular Red Light Challenge!!!!!


Now our next award is a doozy. Which big name is a better game show host? We're about to find out. Will the nominees please stand up?

(cut to "Bracketeering" sign-in screen)

(Lilbumblebear tries to sign in first, but Rousav gets in first and removes himself; then Kamikaze tries to get in, but removes himself as well, but Lilbumblebear gets an automatic VIP sign in and everyone else goes in.)

(Cue "Best Host" graphic)

HUNTER MARCH (Emogenius)

SNOOP DOGG (The Joker's Wild)


JAMIE FOXX (Beat Shazam)

(Cut to "Best Host" bracket and cut to host)

And who is the Best Host? Let's let our bracket determine who.

(Snoop and Tommy advance)

Looks like Snoop and Tommy in the finals......

(snoop Edges Tommy by a landslide)

And it's Snoop doggy Dogg!


Snoop: Yea yay!  I wanna thank my fam, the boss lady Shanute, and the same people that took my favorite game show to a whole different reality, LBC-ya!


And our next performer is a photographer who's improviser. Doing a Miley Cyrus song is my good insta-friend from Montreal, Cindy Melissa Boisvert!



We got a lot of stuff left to do, so let's have our honorable mentions of 2017.

The "Use your imagination" award went to Austin Rogers for his introductions. Go ahead. Do something else than "Say "Hi" to the folks back home. Trust us.

The "Gummy earworm" award went to "Happy" by Pharell Willams for its new show "Funny You Should Ask." How many royalty checks can Pharrell cash on this Byron Allen-produced program before the original sixties theme takes over? Not so much.

The "Dressed to impress" award went to the cast of TPIR for its 2017 Halloween edition of the program. Okay, LMAD, do one on The Fantastic 4. 

The "why are you so hyper" award goes to the host of "That's The Word." My word is......decaf.

The "Let's watch something else" award went to Family Feud for not only giving us the prime time hours on Monday-Friday, but still doing it in syndication.

The "hair raising" award went to Hunter March. For his hair. Hal March must be proud.

The "make up your darn mind, already" went to Buzzr for replacing both Anderson Feud and Wordplay with something better. Guess it was issues that drove viewers away, eh?

And finally, the "Gold Mine" award went to Wink Martindale's Youtube page for uncovering more hidden gems.

(song stops)

And now is the part of the whole thing where Robyn Cage comes out of her postion to perform for us, so Robyn, won't you please do a remix of one of your new hits?


Very good stuff. On to our next award. There are great shows...............and then there are newer shows. Have a look at these.

(cut to "Fibbage 3" graphics to "Best New Show")

FUNNY YOU SHOULD ASK (Entertainment Studios)



CANDY CRUSH (Endemol/King)


(cue graphics back to host)

And the newest show  of 2017.................

(opens Lootcrate for winner)

Once again, The Joker's Wild!


Madison: This is Snoop's 2nd award of the night. His first was for Best Reboot earlier.

Snoop: Wow man, can't believe I got 2 awizz-wards....


But um....I wanna thank you all for your appeciation of the program and my support......and we hope we can get another season.....Peace.


Me: Moving along now is a Mormon....with a positive song......from Utah...Nadia Khristean.



And now we pay tribute to those who are gone......too soon.

In Loving Memory















Thank you. Now the biggest moment that defined 2017. The final award of the night. Are you ready?

(audience roars)

They're ready and the nominees are.........

(cut to "Civic Doodle" gameplay and shows Best Moment of 2017 on the frame)

(first frame shows TPIR giving away a car as a one-bid)

(second frame shows Buzzy Cohen winning the J! tournament of champions)

(3rd frame shows Austin Cohen's J! run)

(4th frame shows an $80,000 TPIR Showcase Showdown)

(5th frame shows a new Plinko record)

(cut to host)

Alright, bring out the unrevealed artwork..............

The moment of 2017 goes to.................

(artwork reveals Austin Rogers)

The Austin Rogers reign of terror!


Austin: Thank you so much. I want to thank my firends for helping me win this award, Alex Trebek for making me a better and smarter, and everyone for being the best Jeopardy! champion of 2017. Thank you very much.


Well, what can't an award show be without the final performance. These 2 people I'm about to introduce are the keepers of the GSN vault, the real nerd parody duo, the world famous................Library Bards! Give it up!



And with that......we're done. I wanna thank God, my ever loving writers and staff, and of guys. We're off until January and until then...............Play on i sense a firestorm?

(confetti firestorm takes over the theater)